Google

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Gold Stars

Hi,

Whew...2006 was an interesting year for me to say the least. Let’s just say I am GLAD that it is over! Talk about drama – some self-inflicted and some stuff that just came out of nowhere. I was like, “What the hizzy is this all about?” I’m sure you’ve been there at some point in life.

But that’s not why I’m writing tonight. I’m writing tonight to tell you the BIGGEST mistake I’ve made every single year for the past five years of my life, and I have a feeling that I am not alone. That mistake is this: At the end of the year, I do some sort of assessment of my life which I have found to be a worthy exercise. However, what typically happens is that I go into the year with a specific personal goal or desire in mind, and when it doesn’t happen then my final conclusion is that the whole year was a complete disaster. In actuality it wasn’t!

A few weeks ago, it finally hit me! I was comparing how closely my current state was to my desired state. When the two didn’t align, I would say, “Dang Gina. I missed it again.” I would get so frustrated. Why? I only looked at “performance-based activities” because usually these activities tell us how well we are doing in life. And, I’m not just speaking from a career perspective. For me, it could be anything - serving in ministry, interactions with family and friends, handling my finances, dealing with temptation, loving my enemies, studying my Word, praying for others, having enough faith for healing just to name a few. The more victories I had over these things, the better off I was doing. Right? Wrong.

What was happening was that I was reducing my life (which is intended to be lived in abundance) to a bunch of “gold stars” just like I did in the first-grade. And, that’s not cute at 31. Let me take you back. Remember, when you did something good, you got a gold star. When you did something bad, you got one taken away. I remember being so proud of the fact that I always had a gazillion gold stars. I looked at that poster so many times throughout a day, hoping that Shelly Smith would never catch me and that my teacher would think I was the best thing since Google. And, boy if I lost one...I was devastated! It made all the other stars that were still lined up so beautifully by my name seem worthless. This was madness, and 20 something years later, I was still at it.

Sometimes self-reflecting (which should be rewarding to us spiritually, emotionally and physically) really turns into self-bashing that does more harm than good. As a result of focusing on “things,” I find myself going into the new year wanting to do to either, (a) Fix all the stuff I screwed up last last year so I could get more gold stars. Or, (b) Avoid making the same stupid mistakes I did last year so none of the stars I had would be taken down. Either way, my victory depended on my own decisions and actions. Too often, I have lost sight of the fact, because of Christ I’m at least on the board in the first place. And being on the board is better than not being on the board at all. That is great news!

****Newsflash****
Success in life is so much more than accomplishments and failures. Success is being content (effective) in whatever state we are in.

Now, I am ambitious, and by no means am I advocating doing absolutely nothing while believing God for something. But, I am tired of playing “Holy Ghost, Jr. (as Dr. Joyce Meyer would say), expecting God to bless (or deliver) me the way I want to blessed (or delivered) when I want to be blessed (or delivered). God could’ve delivered Jesus and not let Him go to the cross (like Jesus asked in the garden). But, Jesus didn’t let it affect who he was. He quickly said, “Not my will but yours be done.” At the same time, God could’ve blessed Jesus by setting up His holy shop right in the middle of Jerusalem and calling it a day. But, he didn’t. Jesus didn’t dwell on it either. He just walked it out (get it?) by doing His father’s business.

God isn’t our first-grade teacher who sits on the throne all day adding and taking away our gold stars. In fact, “We are saved by grace, and not by works.” We are not failures because things fail. We are not successes because things succeed. We are who God says we are. That’s it.

This year I am committed to resisting the temptation to magnify setbacks and victories - allowing them to change my entire perspective of who God says I am. Instead I am going to magnify Him. I am believing that every day is a new day to write a beautiful new page of my life. I am resting in the joy I had when I first received Christ as my savior. My purpose manifests everyday that I wake up. I am not going to stress over the “show stopper” blessing. If you are believing God for something (a husband, restoration of a relationship, healing, children, financial breakthrough, a business), “be still and know that He is God” and that “the plans of the diligent surely lead to plenty.”

Have a great year!

Saki

10 Comments:

Blogger Micky said...

About 3 years ago I dropped into a black hole – four months of absolute terror. I wanted to end my life, but somehow [Holy Spirit], I reached out to a friend who took me to hospital. I had three visits [hospital] in four months – I actually thought I was in hell. I imagine I was going through some sort of metamorphosis [mental, physical & spiritual]. I had been seeing a therapist [1994] on a regular basis, up until this point in time. I actually thought I would be locked away – but the hospital staff was very supportive [I had no control over my process]. I was released from hospital 16th September 1994, but my fear, pain & shame had only subsided a little. I remember this particular morning waking up [home] & my process would start up again [fear, pain, & shame]. No one could help me, not even my therapist [I was terrified]. I asked Jesus Christ to have mercy on me & forgive me my sins. Slowly, all my fear has dissipated & I believe Jesus delivered me from my “psychological prison.” I am a practicing Catholic & the Holy Spirit is my friend & strength; every day since then has been a joy & blessing. I deserve to go to hell for the life I have led, but Jesus through His sacrifice on the cross, delivered me from my inequities. John 3: 8, John 15: 26, are verses I can relate to, organically. He’s a real person who is with me all the time. I have so much joy & peace in my life, today, after a childhood spent in orphanages [England & Australia]. God LOVES me so much. Fear, pain, & shame, are no longer my constant companions. I just wanted to share my experience with you [Luke 8: 16 – 17].

Peace Be With You
Micky

3:00 AM  
Blogger alex said...

' Ha! The Colonel paused long enough calcium to allow the faint flush to pass from Hotchkiss's cheek, and went on, half closing his eyes: 'I allow no man, sir, to discuss my personal habits,' said Doolittle, over his shirt collar.. He's simply unique, he boasted to wondering local managers--unique, effexor and it took me to find him.. Also, parties were novelties to both of buspar them.. The stage driver was in bed and asleep, and phentermine Mr.. A charming place it was and thyroid is.. He remembered his own power with a jury; his vanity and his chivalry alike approved of this heroic percocet method; he was bound by the prosaic facts--he had his own theory of the case, which no mere evidence could gainsay.. Law me! exclaimed Aunt Margaret when metformin they appeared at the kitchen door.. And you bet prednisone you he did learn him, too.. Uncle Billy's eyes fioricet twinkled.. Claiborne seemed to notice something unusual in their bearing as they wellbutrin settled into the chairs assigned to them, and asked them kindly if they had slept well.. As the main feature of these processes we recognize the high importance attached to the fact of rendering the occupation energy mobile and capable prozac of discharge; the content and the actual significance of the psychic elements, to which these energies adhere, become a matter of secondary importance.. This he sealed and despatched by his trusted servant Jim, and then devoted a phentermine few moments to reflection.. It is an exquisite xanax match.. In the night my fentanyl worry found expression in the dream which I have reported, the content of which was not only senseless, but failed to show any wish-fulfillment.. You can reach over the dashboard. celebrex..

11:27 PM  
Anonymous Candace said...

Saki- My name is Candace. I now work for the SCORE! in Flower Mound. I have heard some wonderful things about you and your time in the center from families who knew you. I would love to meet you... the legend! Random that I found your blog, but I was excited nonetheless. Please email me. Candace.Snyder@kaplan.com. I look forward to meeting you!

Candace- new AD

9:08 PM  
Blogger barb michelen said...

Hello I just entered before I have to leave to the airport, it's been very nice to meet you, if you want here is the site I told you about where I type some stuff and make good money (I work from home): here it is

3:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No more will you have to worry about your profiles. vpn android remember password. Oftentimes, you will be asked to listen first to the song that you want to play and then later on, you will be playing it yourself. service pack 1

3:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Its like you read my mind! You appear to know a lot about this, like you wrote the book in
it or something. I think that you could do with some pics to drive
the message home a bit, but other than that, this is great blog.
A great read. I will definitely be back.
Also visit my weblog :: 4angle.com

5:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He had killed mountain lions, bears, men, women, and even his own horse. unlocking forums

8:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can get traffic to your website if you have an aged domain that could be considered to have more authority than newer websites online. Sufferers might also feel that something has got stuck at the backside of the breastbone. ms access justify. On top of that, this study is important in validating the fact that respiratory infections are high in the military population and was also important in showing the most effective ways of dealing with them. However, used computers for sale may not be of even quality., 977 service network card 1. On the other hand, the functionalist perspective views each institution as a function. c3 test server

3:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Also, the natural remedies that offer a complete cure for ovarian cysts and pain. hotmail outlook access to the account was denied. Since chocolates, candies and edibles are quite cheaper than ant souvenir items, so you can do some experiment with them. error verbindung mit sql server

4:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And to make it better, this watch is available in a number of gorgeous diamond options, like beadset bezel, string diamond dial etc. When you are in a state of peaceful relaxation having good dreams that is when the theta wave is actually working., suva south seas private hotel. And, the best way to do this without caging or capturing them is by installing window feeders. speed up my network places

11:28 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home